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Your Spouse's Support
Crucial For Your
Success
(Draft -- You are looking at an early draft of this
topic. It has not yet been proofed, and it will now
doubt be massaged many times over for context, grammar,
and clarity)
Achieving great
business success takes a lot of time, preparation and
hard work. While a person is working their full time job
to meet their current obligations, they must also be
fine-tuning themselves, and this takes time -- time
normally spent with your family.
Family is the most important thing in our lives, but a
proper balance is required when juggling work,
education, and family. If you are in a situation, where
your spouse is inflexible and requires that all of your
free time needs to be with them – then your chances for
great business success is slim to none. I have seen many
people who had everything it took to be a great business
success never achieve that success because of an overly
demanding spouse.
Many spouses either do not understand the dream for
business success that others have, do not understand the
commitment it requires, or are too greedy to allow it to
happen. My only advice is for you to sit down when the
timing for your spouse being receptive is right – and
explain to them that you want to be a successful
entrepreneur, and for your family to have all of the
rewards that comes with that. However, to become a
successful entrepreneur, you will need to prepare
yourself and it is initially time consuming.
Additionally, once you have prepared yourself and
ultimately have ownership in a business – you will not
be working a 40-hour workweek until the business is
stable and profitable; and you have a dependable,
competent, and loyal management team in place
responsible for much of the day-to-day operations. If
your spouse is understanding and supportive – consider
yourself lucky, as too many are not.
If you are in a rough marriage where your spouse is not
only unsupportive of your goals – but also complains
about virtually everything you do – you will need either
to forget your goals or forget your spouse. It is near
impossible to motivate yourself towards success while
your spouse is tearing you down at the same time. You
have one of three alternatives:
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1. The most desirable alternative is to try to
change your spouse’s behavior. Try talking, try
counseling, and try whatever you think will work. Go
the extra mile to satisfy you did everything
possible before considering the next two more
drastic alternatives.
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2. If you are determined in achieving your goals and
you spouse stands in the way of them – an
alternative is divorce. This is time for a gut
check. While it is near impossible to achieve great
success and retain it with an unsupportive spouse –
I guess it would not technically be impossible.
However, where do you see yourself five years from
now, ten years, twenty years, and thirty years? How
happy do you expect to be with your “Life Partner”?
Our life on Earth is so short, why spend it in a
miserable marriage that you are convinced can never
get better. Everyone has a “Soul Mate” out there
somewhere. Someone they love and can never see
themselves not being their life’s partner. If your
spouse is not that soul mate and life’s partner –
the better time to change your situation is sooner
rather than later. The longer a bad marriage goes on
– the harder the divorce will become; the more of
your life was wasted; and the more difficult it is
finally hooking up with your “Soul Mate”. It does
not get any cheaper once you have achieved great
success either.
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3. Give up your goal and lead a miserable life
wondering what could have been.
Finally, reward the spouse who supported you on your way
up. The more money you have – the more attractive you
become to others, and the more temptation opportunities
you will find presented. Additionally, success goes to
many people’s heads and in their minds and they become
bigger than whom they really are. If your spouse
supported you on the way up, it is only right to repay
their loyalty with your loyalty. Be generous with them
by giving them all you can comfortably afford, and make
up for the time together, which was lost getting to
where you wanted be. Goals (you did read that Secret To
Success – right?) generally start out looking financial
– but mainly because you want you family to be
comfortable and have the nice things in life. Once you
achieve those initial goals – your goals should turn
more towards your family’s increased happiness and
security.
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