Monthly Archives: June 2013

Proud to be a

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Annual Meeting of Time Travelers

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I was Green, Before Green Was Cool

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Checking out at the store, the young cashier suggested to the older woman, that she should bring her own grocery bags because plastic bags weren’t good for the …environment.

The woman apologized and explained, “We didn’t have this green thing back in my earlier days.” The young clerk responded, “That’s our problem today. Your generation did not care enough to save our environment f or future generations.”

She was right — our generation didn’t have the green thing in its day.

Back then, we returned milk bottles, soda bottles and beer bottles to the store. The store sent them back to the plant to be washed and sterilized and refilled, so it could use the same bottles over and over. So they really were truly recycled. But we didn’t have the green thing back in our day.

Grocery stores bagged our groceries in brown paper bags, that we reused for numerous things, most memorable besides household garbage bags, was the use of brown paper bags as book covers for our schoolbooks. This was to ensure that public property, (the books provided for our use by the school) was not defaced by our scribbling’s. Then we were able to personalize our books on the brown paper bags. But too bad we didn’t do the green thing back then.

We walked up stairs, because we didn’t have an escalator in every store and office building. We walked to the grocery store and didn’t climb into a 300-horsepower machine every time we had to go two blocks. But she was right. We didn’t have the green thing in our day.

Back then, we washed the baby’s diapers because we didn’t have the throwaway kind. We dried clothes on a line, not in an energy-gobbling machine burning up 220 volts — wind and solar power really did dry our clothes back in our early days. Kids got hand-me-down clothes from their brothers or sisters, not always brand-new clothing. But that young lady is right; we didn’t have the green thing back in our day.

Back then, we had one TV, or radio, in the house — not a TV in every room. And the TV had a small screen the size of a handkerchief (remember them?), not a screen the size of the state of Montana.

In the kitchen, we blended and stirred by hand because we didn’t have electric machines to do everything for us. When we packaged a fragile item to send in the mail, we used wadded up old newspapers to cushion it, not Styrofoam or plastic bubble wrap.

Back then, we didn’t fire up an engine and burn gasoline just to cut the lawn. We used a push mower that ran on human power. We exercised by working so we didn’t need to go to a health club to run on treadmills that operate on electricity. But she’s right; we didn’t have the green thing back then.

We drank from a fountain when we were thirsty instead of using a cup or a plastic bottle every time we had a drink of water. We refilled writing pens with ink instead of buying a new pen, and we replaced the razor blades in a razor instead of throwing away the whole razor just because the blade got dull. But we didn’t have the green thing back then.

Back then, people took the streetcar or a bus and kids rode their bikes to school or walked instead of turning their moms into a 24-hour taxi service. We had one electrical outlet in a room, not an entire bank of sockets to power a dozen appliances. And we didn’t need a computerized gadget to receive a signal beamed from satellites 23,000 miles out in space in order to find the nearest burger joint.

But isn’t it sad the current generation laments how wasteful we old folks were just because we didn’t have the green thing back then?

Please forward this on to another selfish old person who needs a lesson in conservation from a smart-ass young person.

Master I can Blink Him Back to Kenya

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Monkeys

If you start with a cage containing five monkeys and inside the cage, hang a banana on a string from the top and then you place a set of stairs under the banana, before long a monkey will go to the stairs and climb toward the banana.

As soon as he touches the stairs, you spray all the other monkeys with cold water.

After a while another monkey makes an attempt with same result … all the other monkeys are sprayed with cold water. Pretty soon when another monkey tries to climb the stairs, the other monkeys will try to prevent it.

Now, put the cold water away.

Remove one monkey from the cage and replace it with a new one.

The new monkey sees the banana and attempts to climb the stairs. To his shock, all of the other monkeys beat the crap out of him. After another attempt and attack, he knows that if he tries to climb the stairs he will be assaulted.

Next, remove another of the original five monkeys, replacing it with a new one.

The newcomer goes to the stairs and is attacked. The previous newcomer takes part in the punishment…… with enthusiasm, because he is now part of the “team”.

Then, replace a third original monkey with a new one, followed by the fourth, then the fifth. Every time the newest monkey takes to the stairs, he is attacked.

Now, the monkeys that are beating him up have no idea why they were not permitted to climb the stairs. Neither do they know why they are participating in the beating of the newest monkey.

Finally, having replaced all of the original monkeys, none of the remaining monkeys will have ever been sprayed with cold water. Nevertheless, not one of the monkeys will try to climb the stairway for the banana.

Why, you ask? Because in their minds…that is the way it has always been!

This, my friends, is how Congress operates… and this is why, from time to time:

ALL of the monkeys need to be REPLACED AT THE SAME TIME.

BTW — a group of monkeys is called a Congress

Virtual State of the Union

Sponsor Report – 2013 Hot Rod Reunion

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Dave Schultz
June 17, 2013

The Hot Rod Reunion is a NHRA Musuem benefit by “Invitation (Limited to 300 cars) Only” in Bowling Green, KY the Thursday (arrive Wednesday) through Saturday before Father’s Day. While it is packed full of racing, the shear number of cars and exhibitions, plus a huge car show makes it more of a Social Event than a race. Indeed, in three days we got one Time Trial and one Qualifying on Thursday, and 1 Qualifying on Friday – before eliminations began on Saturday.

The Schultz team (Dallas, Hope, Dave & three dogs) left the shop at 9AM Tuesday. At 1pm the Motorhome’s generator turned off. When it was turned back on — it would run but not provide electricity. A rest area diagnosis found that the relay box that switches between shore power and generator had caught fire from a short. We also observed that one of the six 14-ply new (bought on the way to Bradenton in March) trailer tires had a golf ball size bubble in the side wall.

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969056_4938973427888_1259031953_nTwo hours later and $600 lighter, the relay box was replaced and we were back on the road. We decided not to change the tire yet — but to watch it closely.

We arrived at the Walmart in Jackson, TN (our typical I-40 overnight stop for us) at midnight. Back on the road at 9AM Wednesday, and we arrived at the track to set up pits and tech cars in at 1PM. These tech guys put the cars and equipment under a microscope — and I had to get a new pair of gloves because of a 1/2″ rip at a seam in the palm.

981259_425013150929904_1832257875_oNostalgia Drag World posted the above photo on their site, saying: It wouldn’t be a hot rod reunion without the ‘Texas Whale’ owned and driven by Dave Schultz. A crowd favorite with those launches. At Bowling Green, KY. — with Dave Schultz.

Thursday we ran the cars in a Time Trial at 10:30 through a 40MPH head wind. We thought we’d get two Time Trials — but they canceled the second. At 1:30PM we got a no notice call to the lanes for the 1st round Qualifying. It was expected after 3PM.

HRR2013Friday at 9AM we were called to the lanes for the second Qualifying. Were suppose to get another Qualifying in the afternoon — but that too was canceled. The golf ball sized bubble in the trailer tire had grown to Softball size and was at the bead — so we swapped it for a spare.

HRR2013Saturday we were called to the lanes at 9:30 for the first round of Eliminations — but waited quite some time before we ran. Most all of us assumed the cars would run slower from the increased temperature — but most all of us broke out from that assumption because the humidity improved more than the temperature raised. Dallas and I were 1st round runner ups — and our four day adventure ended with only 4 passes each.

We were on the road back home by 1PM, and at our shop at 1PM Sunday morning.

Again, this wasn’t a points race, and it was more of a Social Event for the drivers. We had a great time swapping lies with the other 30 Nostalgia Super Stock drivers, and a NSS Bar-B-Q in DW & Barry’s pits. Now we’re happy to be home so we can get ready for our next points race in Joliet, IL. We’d just put a new engine in the Texas Whale — so these four passes were good break-in passes for the rings to seat prior to a points race. The cars ran very good.

Hope you didn’t have an awkward Fathers Day

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Free Stuff

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I’m on it

So my bank informed me when I opened an account

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Hey Baby — what are you wearing?

Cialis

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