A Diamond in the Rough: Lots of flaws. | |
Apart For Restoration: Missing its rarest and most expensive parts. | |
All-Original Parts: Everything is worn out. | |
Arizona Car: Bleached paint, dried out weather-stripping, faded upholstery, and cracked dash top. | |
Best Offer: A car that’s been for sale since Moby Dick was a guppy. | |
Cream Puff: A tan car that smokes. | |
Dealer Maintained: Dealer boned them — so now they want to bone you. | |
Driven Daily: and beaten to death. | |
Firm: Don’t really want to sell. | |
Flawless: Seller is legally blind. | |
Getting Married: and will never have a fun car again. | |
Good For Restoration: Junk yard wouldn’t take it. | |
Going Abroad: Sold last POS car to a mob member. | |
Great on Gas: One barrel carb. | |
High Mileage: Drive train shot. | |
Illness Forces Sale: Got sick when found out how much it would cost to fix. | |
Just Inspected: (and you will be as shocked as I was that it passed) | |
Leave Message: Being stalked by past buyers he has sold to. | |
Limited Edition: Car Maker desperate to sell this model. | |
Little Old Lady Driven: Engine internals carbon encrusted from never being revved to over 1,500 RPM. | |
Looks Great: When viewed under sodium lights at midnight in a storm. | |
Low Miles: Broke down many years ago. | |
Many Extras: Radio, seat and windows included. | |
Minor Rust: No trunk or floor pans. | |
Mint condition: Untouched by children. | |
Needs Battery: Has a bad alternator or a mystery short circuit. | |
Needs Engine: See high mileage. | |
Needs Head Gasket: Driven across desert with a clogged radiator. | |
Needs TLC: about $5,000 to 10,000 ought to cover the repairs. | |
Never Seen Rain: A lemon the dealer would take back. | |
New Interior: Aftermarket Sunroof. | |
New Paint: Recent accident. | |
New Radio: and windows. | |
New Springs: Driven by a man drinking Slimfast | |
New Wheel Bearings: Driven by short old lady that keeps hitting curbs. | |
No Title: Stolen. | |
One of a Kind: Purple car with orange interior. | |
Original Owner: Now in nursing home. | |
Pace Car: Manufacturer couldn’t sell them without first putting decals on it. | |
Parts Car Included: Replacement parts impossible to find. | |
Quick Sale: IRS is about to foreclose on all assets. | |
Rebuildable: Good Title | |
Runs Strong: if you can get it started. | |
Small Dent: You’ll need a replacement 1/4 panel. | |
Solid Body: Rust though on the frame rails. | |
Tinted Windows: Owner likes to smoke pot while driving. | |
Too Many Cars: This is the worst of them. | |
Two New Front Tires: Needs Front-End alignment. | |
Two New Rear Tires: Punk kid by the name of Andy like to do burnouts. | |
Two-Tone Paint: Painter couldn’t properly match. | |
Very Rare: 1 of 320,768 | |
Wife Forces Sale: Husband caught in the bed of another woman | |
Will Deliver: Desperate | |
Will Trade: Desperate and needs another car or truck. |